R.I.P Kermit

These are part of the latest style in home decor from a "professional" decorator, as featured in a name-brand catalog. You can have a set of 5 for $250. Really? REALLY?
Cuz I think they look like somebody decided to hunt down Kermit the Frog and his friends, chop off their legs, mount them upside down and spray paint them white.

WTF?

I found out yesterday that I am getting knocked down to part-time next year. Not surprising considering that I work for a public school system and the current state of the economy. What was surprising is that even though they offered a 36% cut in pay, and a 33% cut in hours, they expect me to do the same job duties.
Hmmm.....same workload but less pay and less time to do it in? Don't think so.

really? REALLY? Well, nobody gives a crap!

It's been a long time since I have shared a WTF? moment. So...without further adieu (see, I know a tiny bit of French!)...
I confess. I have taken one or two quizes on Facebook. Can't help it. I was lured in by "so and so challenged you", but I was new to the game. We all make the mistake. But, really. Who the f**k cares what movie you are, what beer you are, what horoscope sign you are, what Disney princess you are or what Hollywood legend you are? Even if you thought it was just something to do for fun, there's no reason why you must "publish" your results each and every time so that the rest of us have to read it. And the next one, or the one after that or that new one your co-worker sent you. I could have told you that you were a Corona-drinking, Beavis who loves to whistle while you work while popping pills after a breakfast of Lucky Charms without answering silly questions!
Then, to top it off, you have to post a comment like, "OMG! That is so true! LOL!" or "Gosh, I had no idea!" Come on! I like a silly quiz as much as the next guy. I have quizes at the bottom of this page. I just don't care to know about every single one you take.
In conclusion, if you simply can't resist finding out what state you should be living in or what your hippy name should be, that's fine. Just warn me before we become friends on fb so I can block your ass!

Is it just me?

Or I am the only one who just doesn't understand:

...the big deal over Taylor Swift. She's cute and she wrote some songs. Big whup. Her BFF is Kellie Pickler for crying out loud.

...English Muffins. They're tasteless - oh, except for that crap on the outside that reminds me of sawdust.

...Target clothes. They look all stylish and trendy in the Sunday sales paper but then I get to the store and I can't find what was in the paper or if I do, I try it on and it looks like a fuchsia paper bag. Mossimo-schmosimo. Mizrahi-blah-hi.

...Facebook. Sure, it's fun to see what people are up to after 15 years and 15+ pounds, but after that, who gives a hoot if they had chili for lunch, are too tired to workout or joined " Mapleton Sailing Club." And on top of that, the little fu*ker freezes up on me most of the time. What's up with that?!?

...why Michael Phelps chose to indulge in THAT kind of Southern hospitality? I mean really -you're a record-breaking Olympian and you decided to smoke weed with some Cocks?!?

...why some parents don't give a sh*t about their kids; therefore they have no respect for adults or their classmates and ruin my Tuesday!!!!!

Costume Quiz: results

Carolina Girl:

You are a slutty Cat Woman!

Who cares what's in your checkbook when you look like THIS in pleather!?

A. DeVore:

You are a slutty Mad Hatter!

Have your damn iced tea at the tea party and if the kids get outta line you can sick the Cheshire Cat on them. He always freaked me out.
Janah:

You are a slutty bunny!

Forget the pumpkin part, girl!

Tattooed Minivan Mom:

You are a slutty Super Girl!

You can fly, all while looking smoking hot, on your way to save people!

Krys:

You are a slutty Canadian Mountie!

You can help people get away from fires and at night retire to your cozy cottage in the mountians.

Because everyone knows the best girl costumes are just an excuse to dress slutty! For most of you anyway. Me? I'm going to be this:
Just kiddin! There's no way I could pull off those GLASSES - hee hee.

P.S. Love cupcakes? Me, too. Here's a contest for a cupcake prize, although not the edible kind.

WTF? Costume Quiz

In case you hadn't noticed, I like putting the little quizes at the bottom of my page. Most of them are kinda fun. Wasn't that the best part about all those teen magazines when you were in high school? "What's your dating style?" "Does he really like you?" "Are you ready to go all the way?!" ha!
I took took the featured quiz, "What Should You be for Halloween," three times and each time I got a dumb-ass response: "Candy Corn," "A rabbit dressed as a pumpkin," and "a bumble-bee." Hello? Not unless you're six! So, I decided to do my own costume quiz. Leave a comment answering the questions below by Sunday night or so(I'm not picky)and I'll post next week what I think you should be, including a photo. What do you think?

1. What is your drink of choice?
a. wine
b. beer
c. cocktail
d. water
e. Coke

2. What are you afraid of?
a. the dark
b. the boogie man
c. being fired
d. nothing
e. your checkbook balance the day before payday.

3. What super power would you most like to have?
a. ability to fly
b. ability to run super fast
c. being immortal
d. looking super hot in a leotard
e. being able to help people

4. People have told you you look like
a. their favorite movie actress
b. you know how to have a good time
c. you are younger than you are
d. their mother in law
e. a mug shot from the Post Office

5. Your dream house would be
a. a cozy cottage in the mountains
b. a contemporary loft in the city
c. a sprawling farm out in the country
d. a casual beach bungalow
e. paid for

It's not science, people, it's just some crap I made up for fun! So answer the damn questions already!

WTF Friday: buffet style

Here are your Friday lunch specials for today's WTF buffet:
1. As I was headed home today, I saw the Dumbass of the Day! How do I know it was him? He was passing IN the median doing about 65 mph!
2. I borrowed this from Ashley's Closet:
Who the hell came up with this and why?!?!?
3. This is a little place I pass on my way to work:

Oh, good. I used up my last Canadian yesterday.

4. and finally, I went to Tar-jay today and the only thing I bought were 2 cookies from the snack place. And I Just got paid! WTF?!?

WTF?

(Click to enlarge. Trust me. It's worth it)

WTF?

They were having a sale at White House Black Market: pants were HALF OFF! ha!

This is from our fabulous girls trip back in January. The girls and I were shopping that day and we went into White House Black Market. The sales lady asks if she could put all of us in one big dressing room and she'd bring us stuff to try on. Well, next thing you know, it's the 4 of us and enough items to clothe the Gosslin family 3 times. I was mostly trying on tops, but then the girls wanted me to try on this dress. It was January and I had on boots, which were damp from the rain and jeans and I didn't feel like taking off so I figured I'd just drop my pants and that would give the same effect, right?

WTF Friday

Oh, S**t! I found it....

100 Things About Me #89

WTF Friday: Buffet Style

We have several "WTF" offerings today. You can choose as many as you'd like and come back for seconds. Ice cream and dessert bar not included.

- Darius Rucker (from Hootie and the Blowfish) has a country song out that is in heavy rotation on one of our local country stations.


-Steve has taken to drinking Earl Grey tea.


-While at the zoo today, we saw turtles mating and a monkey of some kind masturbating. nice.


-This is a sign posted at the fountain at Waterfront Park in Charleston.
It's a freakin fountain that splashes on the ground! What moron drowned here so that this sign was needed?!

- Every single thing about the show, "America's Got Talent." The contestants, the judges, the audience, the whole sha-bang!

I hope you enjoyed today's selection. Be sure and tip Jolene when ya'll are done. Have a good day, now!

WTF Friday...oops!

I meant to have WTF Friday yesterday but I did not get around to it with swimming at our friend's house, sitting down with incredibly helpful guy at Lowe's, and Savannah wearing big girl panties for 7 hours yesterday WITH NO ACCIDENT! I think it was pure luck, but I'll take it!
Anyway, My SIL sent me this the other day. To be honest, I was too skeeved out by the title, "Too Old to Breastfeed" and comments to actually watch the video. Let me know if you are brave enough to do so.
Come on people! If your child is old enough to walk, feed themselves, do pre-algebra, comment on your lingerie, or play the Wii, they are too old to breastfeed! And I thought this kid was bad?
WTF?!?

Naughty Mommy!

Here's a new favorite blog I've been reading. She's a mom, a witty writer, oh- and she cusses a lot, but she's a good read.
Definitely check out these posts: "You're on crack...(a.k.a.F**k Elmo)" and "It's just a blog."
http://bejewell.wordpress.com/
On the one hand I'm playing into the madness by mentioning her here, but I don't care. She's good. Yeah Bean!

What the f...?

Know how some things just make you laugh so hard you cry? I had tears rolling down my face after this particular email I got...but I'm not cool enough to know how to show you THAT email so here is a link to the site it came from. Just keep clicking on "next" to see the next one. Most are a little offensive, in case you're not interested.
Steve got a book like this for Christmas- wacky signs and poor use of grammar from all over the world. I would crack up so much I only let myself read a few pages a day!
Hope you like it as much as I did. If not, never mind...

What the...?

Oh my. I couldn't resist this one, so I had to have "WTF?!" THURSDAY!
One word: Fantasia
Did you see American Idol last night? If not, you must watch"Bore Me" on You Tube here.
That was the scariest, weirdest, most haneous thing I have seen on TV in a while. Apparently Simon agreed by the look on his face (2:57 into the You Tube video). wow...

"What the...?"

Oh, here it is folks! Another edition of "WTF?" Friday!

See the boy in the picture, wearing the white hat? He'll be 2 soon his mom said. She might want to get him a bike like we had at the park yesterday. How nice. Do I know this boy? No. But his name is probably Rich because that's what he'll need to be in order to afford all the therapy he'll need later in life because his mother is STILL BREASTFEEDING HIM! OMG! I've heard that people breastfeed up to 2 years old, but I didn't think anyone besides mothers in 3rd world countries and religious cults actually did it! This woman sat on a park bench, lifted her shirt and BANG! brestfed him right there! I'm not knocking breasfeeding altogether. I did it for 6 months myself although I don't really know how. It was such a magical day to know my boobs belonged to me again and could be confined in a normal bra without flaps, pads and extra hooks. I just couldn't imagine...

Anyway...we had a nice time at the park. We had a pic-nic and the girls played and played. BFF!

What the...?

This isn't a true "WTF", but it'll do.

Savannah has gotten to where she won't always take a nap. Dissappointing for me, but not too surprising for a 31 month old. Today, she wouldn't take a nap. She got up several times after the first attempt. I didn't react strongly and let her continue whatever it was she was doing for the most part. After a while I told her, "It's quiet time in your room. You don't have to go to sleep, but you need to play quiet in your room." This actually worked pretty well for about 20 minutes. I even thought she may have dozed off. Nope. No luck. She comes out again and heas for the living room. I go into her room and this is what I see:

toddler + 20 minutes alone= chaos

Premature "What the...?"

I couldn't save this until Friday...
http://www.geekoffice.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=643&Itemid=65

What the...?

Perhaps this would have been a better "Wordless Wednesday" b/c I don't know much about this one except it's Steve and a co-worker apparently stopping for cocktail hour in a cavern in Europe somewhere.....

It certainly ain't the Lawrence Welk Show

Back home again! I'm tired, but all in all, I had a good time on my trip and thought the conference was worthwile. My aunt, my mom's sister, lives in Jacksonville and I had made plans to see her while I was in town. They picked me up from the hotel and then we swung by their place before going to dinner. Afterwards, we were going to the American Legion to "dance and have a few drinks." What an experience that was!
Where do I begin? For those of you who may be unfamiliar, the American Legion is a social organization for veterans. This one has a bar, pool table(25cent/game), entertainment and occasionally food. They even have a swimming pool and Tiki hut out back for the summer. The room was covered in dark paneling, linolium flooring and cigarette smoke. I was definately the youngest one there, with the average age being probably 65. Even the bartender asked me if I was old enough to drink. I thought, "yeah lady, if I served drinks to 70 year-olds all day, I'd think I looked like a youngin' too." But there wasn't any bingo or knitting going on. Our entertainment for the evening was Vickie Lee. She sounded like Tanya Tucker and Tammy Wynette and looked like a plus size Dolly Parton. In between songs she played, "electric slide," "Cupid shuffle," "the twist" and other songs to dance to...which of course we did. I even two-stepped (I think that's what it was) with 2 older gentlemen. We finally got out of there just before midnight. Crazy! But it was a lot of fun!
These pictures just don't do it justice, but you get an idea...